 Loving Pregnant Belly Abstract by teacupviking on etsy I really have tried not to make all my posts about pregnancy but it is teaching me so much about life that I can't help it. And, I'm working on releasing all the 'shoulds' and just following the wisdom of my journey. Pregnancy is my current lens of experience and I hope you can learn from it too. I'm sure motherhood will be quite an interesting teacher as well when it gets here.
We talk a lot in self development circles about being present in the moment. Pregnancy has brought me into my body and into the present moment in ways I never thought about before. For one thing, I have a little being who will literally kick me occasionally to bring me back to paying attention to my body. That is a wonderous and startling and strange experience, certainly. And every movement brings me right to where I am and feeling my body. (My bladder also gets my attention fairly often, but that's another story...)
When I cook, I think more consciously about what I'm eating and I put more thought and love into it because it's for my little one. I'm taking self-care more seriously and trying to stay in optimum health so I can have a home birth. I'm drinking the amount of water I know I should, when before I sometimes missed. I have been lucky not to get too many bad side effects- no crazy cravings, not much heartburn, etc. But when I do get a pain or ache, I'm intensely aware of it so that I can make sure nothing is wrong.
I'm paying more attention to my body's cues. When I'm tired, I rest. When I'm hungry, I eat. I often have to move and stretch, so I'm getting up from my desk more often and sitting on a yoga ball at my desk sometimes. These all bring my attention back into my body. I'm enjoying reading and sleeping in and all the little moments to myself right now, because I know that soon those will all be different. When I bend over now to pick up something, I'm reminded that there's a little extra in my middle (although I'm very happy that my mobility is still mostly uninhibited). And I look at myself in the mirror all the time- looking for any changes or developments.
I've been taking more self portraits, to track the belly explosion, and noticed that people are so supportive about appearance to pregnant women. None of my other profile photos have elicited so many compliments and "You're glowing"s. Even when they're dimly lit and my hair is barely brushed and I am certainly not glowing. I think there's a lesson there for how we can support others- when a friend posts a photo, we should always tell them they're beautiful. Because we can always see it and they sometimes can't.
The bigger lesson, though, in all this, is that why do I have to wait until there is a baby in my body to care so much for me? Why can I nap now but not before? (Partly because the exhaustion won't let me get by without napping, but still, it's not fair to my body to push past tired.) Why am I paying attention to everything but what my body feels like right now?
I'm hoping I'll remember this, at least in glimmers, when I'm a mama, because I know mamas are the most notorious about forgetting themselves and their bodies. Maybe that's part of why we start out with these 9 months of intense presence, so we'll have something to remember when there are other beings calling out for our attention 24-7.
And I'm hoping that you'll be inspired to give yourself at least 20 minutes of paying attention to yourself today.
If you want to explore your dreams and open up to more self-care and attention, please check out my Work page for more info on how we could work together. Or go here to set up a free Fairy Godmother Session to dig into your dreams and see what magic we can find.
My 2013 Incredible Year Planner!
Wow- It's already 2013! Time just seems to be speeding up for me every year. Here we are on the cusp of another awesome year! As we turn the page on each year to the new blank chapter to be written, I feel the need for reflection and planning, just like most people. My birthday is New Year's Eve, so this is truly the new year beginning for me. Over the last three years, my most essential planning tool has become Leonie Dawson's Incredible Year Planner (formerly known as the Creating My Goddess Year Planner) (Yes, that's an affiliate link. I adore this product and would love for you to have your own.) It's beautifully colorful and inspiring, while being extremely useful and functional at the same time. One of the key pieces is that it takes you through a review of your past year, so that you see how far you've come, how much you've grown and learned. And then it builds your new year goals, dreams, plans. It's far too much to work through in just a few hours (and planning your year is important, so that's ok) so I spread it out over a week or two. I start with the releasing of 2012 and let that experience have the honor and gratitude it deserves. Then, I spend an afternoon thumbing through 2013 and answering the parts that come easily, while I chew on the tougher parts. I let it simmer for a while and come back the next day.
100 Things to Do in 2013!!!
Today is my third day. I'm filling in my 100 Things to Do list. Because it's so long, it really makes you S-T-R-E-T-C-H into things you want to do but would never write down otherwise. And writing them down really helps you make it happen. Last year, one of the first things on my list was to learn Reiki. A good friend of mine sent out an invitation that week to her Reiki training in early February. I was able to mark that one right off and I might have missed it.
I usually get about 40 on the list and then I have to come back a bit later to add more. I keep it running for most of January, whenever I think of new things. Leonie also encourages you to break your goals down into action items so that they can go from dreams to done. (You'll never be the next J.K. Rowling if you don't write a single page.)
This is a wonderful process for starting your year on the right foot. The key is not to get overwhelmed or feel like you should have had it all done by 12-31. I got my 2012 done before New Year's this year, but last year it was after. I figure I've got the whole year ahead and the key is planning something. Just like your GPS needs you to give it an address of where you're headed, you're more likely to reach your dreams if you head in their direction. I still haven't picked my word for the year- that's something I'm still feeling out. Because of the baby, I know my whole world will change in May and I don't want to overpressure myself. So, I'm trying to find something that feels like a gentle stretch forward instead of a big leap.
What do you do for beginning a new year? Do you pick a word or phrase?
If you want to explore your dreams and find more joy in your new year, please check out my Work page for more info on how we could work together. Or go here to set up a free Fairy Godmother Session to dig into your dreams and see what magic we can find.
I've been missing here for the last couple months. I have a great reason- I'm pregnant (!) and that first trimester was just a lot rougher on my body than I expected. I had very little energy, so all of it had to go to basic functions. Most nights I was in bed by 7pm, even though I'm a night owl who is normally up til midnight or later. My thoughts didn't feel all that coherent sometimes, either, so blogging just wasn't on my menu.
Now, my energy is back up and I wanted to take a moment to share my Gratitude List. I try to remember gratitude daily and think of all of my blessings, but it's nice to write the list out and see it all there on paper.
Right now, I'm grateful for:
1. Most importantly, I'm grateful for the beautiful little being who will bless me as their mama in May. Pregnancy has been a whole new adventure and I'm sure motherhood will be more than I can imagine right now.
2. My husband continues to make me laugh and take care of me. I can't wait to see him as a daddy.
3. The rest of my family. My sister's cancer journey has continued and she's having surgery next week, but her strength and courage in this crisis are so inspiring. The rest of the family is rallied around her, as we do, and it's been a good period for all of us to grow and support each other. Lots of laughter has been part of the journey, obviously.
4. Cell phones and Facebook. My husband's family is on a whole other continent, worlds away. We miss them dearly, but cell phones and Facebook help us stay in touch, which is so wonderful. Also, some of my best friends are scattered to the four winds, so Facebook is how we stay together as well.
5. As glad as I am to be pregnant, I'm REALLY glad the nausea part seems to be over. I know there's probably more unfun stuff to come, but that was rough.
6. More than ever, I'm grateful for indoor plumbing. I think back to living in the village & using the pit latrine and I can't imagine doing that pregnant, as often as I have to go. Plus, squatting when I'm 8-9 months along sounds nearly impossible. I have a whole other level of respect for the women of Zambia that had never occurred to me before.
7. Speaking of amenities, my heart goes out to the victims of Sandy who are still without the basics. I'm so grateful for my home & electricity & I hope they get theirs back as soon as possible.
8. Pecan pie, baked macaroni, turkey, and fresh cranberry sauce. Some of my favorite foods and I get to eat them all tomorrow!
9. Beautiful fall days like today. They are such a gift.
10. That I don't have the slightest desire to participate in the madness of Black Friday and I don't have to.
11. Amazon Prime. I love being able to shop on my phone & get most things in 2 days. Our town has very few options for organic food or greener cleaning products, so I order them at Amazon.
12. Holiday Season. I love the winter holidays- the smell of cinnamon and spices, lights and decorations, snowpeople, carols, favorite foods, gifts, chilly air, parties, the whole package.
13. Health. So many around me are dealing with tough health stuff, so it reminds me how grateful I am for my health and how quickly all that can change.
14. Coaching. It is truly an amazing process to watch people wake up to their own magnificence and I'm so grateful I get to be part of that process.
15. You. If you're reading this, then you're part of my circle- friends, clients, or just stumbling across my blog for the first time- I'm grateful you're here.
There are countless other blessings- both great and small- that I'm grateful for, but I'll stop here so I can get my pecan pie out of the oven. Whether or not you're celebrating Thanksgiving, I wish you a joyful time with your loved ones this week. If you want to explore your dreams and find more joy, please check out my Work page for more info on how we could work together. Or go here to set up a free Fairy Godmother Session to dig into your dreams and see what magic we can find.
 Dan, Danica, & Joshua in line at Zam Zam As far as food goes, India was a difficult place for my husband and myself to travel. I have a very low tolerance level for hot spices and my husband doesn’t know what to do without meat (especially beef) at every meal. We went there in May 2010 for the wedding of two close friends. Parvathy’s family was incredibly generous and they cooked for us every day. They tried very hard to make the food less spicy so that we Americans could tolerate it, but I still couldn’t handle most of the food. I was living off of mostly chapati, dosai, and naan (all types of bread). And it was all vegetarian, so my hubby was going crazy for meat.
At the end of the week of wedding festivities, our group of about 25 American guests was on a bus headed back to her parent’s house after a final celebration on her grandmother’s spice plantation. We passed a billboard for KFC and several of us were positively drooling over the thought of food that wasn’t Indian. Click to read the rest over at Kind Over Matter. If you want to explore your dreams and find more joy, please check out my Work page for more info on how we could work together. Or go here to set up a free Fairy Godmother Session to dig into your dreams and see what magic we can find.
Today makes 8 years since I moved into my village in Zambia, where I spent 3 years as a Peace Corps Volunteer in the Community Health Program. It was Easter morning, so it was quiet there while everyone else was at church. I was fresh out of my three-months of training and ready to start the new life I'd signed up for. I was terrified to be there all alone, thousands of miles from home, to figure out the language and culture and start working at a job I wasn't sure I was ready for. I was excited to try it out anyway and to make new friends. Two years later, I signed on for an extra year, so I obviously fell in love with my job and with Zambia. Clearly, that experience is one of the key events of my life and the impact on my growth and development is beyond words. Today I am full of memories and gratitude for the friends I made and the gifts I gained. I am especially grateful to the children who lived near me- they were extremely patient teachers of language and culture. Even though I was a fully capable, able-bodied adult, I never would have survived village life without the help of children under the age of 12.
 Forster, Me, Mwelwa, Chabby, Ellen, Eliza- My best friends and greatest teachers. Here are just 10 of the lessons I learned there:
1. A storytelling circle is a priceless gift. Gather ‘round the fire with your friends and share your stories. Even if you’ve told them 100 times, it’s still so much better than the reruns you could watch instead. Some of my best memories from the village are of those story times, even when I couldn't understand them, because the feeling in the circle was of love and community.
2. We are each individuals and deserve attention. In Zambia, when you walk into a meeting, you go around and shake hands with each person and go through a greeting sequence with them, asking how they are and how their family is. You don’t just wave hello at the whole bunch- that will be offensive and get you nowhere. Back in American settings, I've found that instead of just plowing into asking someone something- like at the grocery store- if I first ask them how they are and really listen, it changes the experience. It's more personal and connected and feels so much better.
3. A smile can still light up a room, even when you don’t speak the same language. And a tremendous amount of your message can be conveyed with facial expressions.
 1. art time in the village! 2. Me, Patrick, Chief Chimesi's son & wife, Chief Chimesi, Parvathy (my best friend & fellow Peace Corps Volunteer) 4. Share whatever you have. I can't count the number of times I'd see two kids sharing one pair of shoes- each wearing one shoe. There is no greater example of sharing than that. And my neighbors always offered to share their food with me, no matter how little of it they had. No matter how little I think I have, I ALWAYS have enough to share with someone else.
5. Make an honest effort. In my meetings, my caveman Bemba normally got my message across (Boil water. Wash Hands. No diarrhea.) and there was always a translator to assist me when it wouldn't. But, the fact that I showed that I was trying to learn the language and making a genuine effort was always well appreciated by my audience. I always got shocked comments from people who were so moved that I'd tried, even though I murdered their language. It's always worth it to try to use your skills, even when you're not yet an expert.
6. Imagination opens the whole world up for your exploration. Zambian kids create the coolest toys. They make their own soccer balls out of plastic grocery bags and string, make real moving toy cars out of juice boxes and flip flops, and use charcoal for chalk. I was constantly in awe of their ability to create something out of nothing.
 Mansa Market 7. One woman's trash is another's treasure. I know this is a clichéd statement, but I saw it for truth in the village. I learned to look at my trash and at recycling in a whole new light. I didn't throw away plastic bottles- I saved them to reuse or to share with my neighbors. I even sent my charcoal brazier home with the kids every day after I finished cooking; because they used them to keep warm while they slept (I had enough blankets and preferred them). The ashes then came back to me and went into my pit latrine to reduce odors. Nothing wasted.
8. There is always room for joy. Laugh, sing, dance. My friends and neighbors in Zambia were not always well fed. There were periods when the harvest was poor and they were starving or sick. However, they were always laughing and singing and dancing. If they can choose joy when they're dealing with so much, how can I not choose it just because I'm having some minor trial? Also, any empty container or flat surface can be a drum. There is never a good excuse not to dance.
9. You can find love in the most unexpected of places. I met my husband in the market, in front of the used tires and miscellaneous metals. It was over a year later that we started dating, but the market will always be special for us, since that's where we first met.
 Me & Joshua- 2007, Zambezi 10. NOTHING tastes as good as fresh, warm peanut butter pounded with your own two hands. Thank you, Zambia! You are always my second home and I'm so grateful for the multitude of blessings you gave me. Thank you to all the beautiful people who are now part of my life and my heart because of that adventure! If you need support in seeking out your dreams, please check out my Work page for more info on how we could work together. Or got here for info about a free Fairy Godmother Session to dig into your dreams and see what magics we can find.
 My photos from a recent photo walk in the riverfront park Every day is a new day. I know this, in my head, but in spring, I really get it. Suddenly, the world is created anew every day. On Tuesday, as I was driving home, I noticed that my neighborhood is suddenly bursting with pink in all shades. The azaleas are blooming and it’s a festival of delight to see the color suddenly all over the place. I couldn't remember seeing them before that moment, so it seemed like overnight everything was brand new. Last night, I saw that the basil seeds I planted are now little baby basil plants (very exciting, since I’m not the greenest-thumbed gal!) in only a few short days. This fresh newness is inspiring and invigorating me. I’m feeling more motivated to create and write and do. During our Spring Equinox celebration, my friend was sharing what she read about the energy inside a seed. She said that they actually start to vibrate inside, until they break forth with a new plant. Just imagine: a whole new life bursting forth, because there was too much to do and create to stay inside that safe seed casing. That’s exactly the feeling that I get in spring- that there is so much to do and so many things to see and so much life to live!!!! I feel like the dog in Up! “Oh! A Ball! Oh, boy! Oh, boy! A Ball! Squirrel!”- just constantly amazed by the world I live in. I’m writing and creating and taking photos and just soaking up the joy that the universe is full of. Yes, ordinary things still go on, like bills and doctor visits and taxes. Unpleasant things don't disappear when the flowers bloom. But the flowers are reminding me that I can choose to bloom where I am, even if it’s not the perfect spot just yet. There is much joy in the blooming and so I do. Every day really is a new day and a new opportunity to bloom. What about you? Do the seasons affect your mood? And, if you’re in the Southern Hemisphere, what does the energy of your season shift feel like? If you need support blooming where you are, please check out my Work page for more info on how we could work together. Or go here for info about a free Fairy Godmother Session to dig into your dreams and see what magics we can find.
In the spirit of Thanksgiving and showing gratitude to our loved ones, I have created some printable cards you can share with the special people in your life. I used Amanda's amazing printables kit (affiliate link) to create them. If you're interested in creating fun things to share, I highly recommend you check out the kit. Here are my 4 cards: (I couldn't resist a little Golden Girls tribute- I love them!) Please print & share these with anyone you need to share you gratitude with. (I hope it goes without saying, but just to be clear- these are free for you to share but not to sell- I spent time creating them.) Here is the printable envelope to go with them. Thank you so much for reading here and for making the world a brighter place with your presence! Happy Thanksgiving & many blessings to you & yours! If you need support in sharing your gratitude and gifts, please check out my Work page for more info on how we could work together. Or go here for info about a free Fairy Godmother Session to dig into your dreams and see what magics we can find.
 This practice of posting my daily gratitude on facebook has been a terrific blessing. I have been happier this week, because I've paid attention in the moments that I'm grateful for. And I've been blessed with 3 rainbows jus this week. Even though last weekend was dreary and rainy, those rainbows showed up to remind me to be hopeful. A wonderful blessing, indeed.
Sept. 29: Today's grain of gratitude: I'm thankful that I really enjoy my coaching classes and am grateful I've checked off several of my to-do's for this week! Yay for productivity!
Sept. 28: Today's gratitude: I'm so happy to have seen another rainbow this week! And now we're enjoying X Factor. It's so nice to see people who can sing like I wish I could.
Sept. 27: Today's gratitude: I'm thankful for laughter. I have laughed a lot today and it always makes the day better. Hope you're all laughing too!
Sept. 26: Today's token of thanks: I am grateful for the tastiness of simple foods- baked chicken with carrots, celery, & roasted cauliflower. So yummy and good for me too.
Sept. 25: Today's thankful tidbit: I'm thankful for frozen custard and for a roof with no leaks. It rained all day, so I haven't made it into the woods for wandering yet, but I've had some lovely rest and time for thinking.
Sept. 24: Today's glimmer of gratitude: I'm thankful for The Big Bang Theory, which makes me laugh every time. And for lazy rainy days with access to favorite shows and no where I have to go.
Sept. 23: Today's grains of gratitude: I am grateful for beauty all around me. I saw *2* rainbows today- one at the grocery store & one when I got home! And I found the perfect fall bouquet- roses that look like a sunset with yellow & red on the same flower.
Please feel free to share your own glimmers of gratitude in the comments. Have a blessed week!
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